An email from the Director of the FBI

[ksmith]

Attn:Beneficiary.

We believe that this notification meets you in a very good present state of mind and health. We the Federal
Bureau of Investigation (FBI) in conjunction with some other relevant Investigation Agencies here in the
United states of America have recently been informed through our Global intelligence monitoring network
that you presently have a transaction going in Europe and Africa as regards to your over-due payment which
was fully endorsed in your favor accordingly.


As a Federal Commission we are here to protect your interest and the interest of all other citizens in the
world .You have been investigated as the beneficiary of the said funds.


With full concern of The F.B.I and the Internal Revenue Service (IRS),we wish to remind you of the
consequences of remitting such huge sums of money without complying fully with the provisions of the
Financial and Allied Matters of 2003, which stipulates that any monitory transaction been done in the United
States Of America and all over the World, must have proper records, which duly guarantees and covers the
transaction as legitimate and legally acquired and not criminally or terrorist associated funds.


You have five days to produce legal proof of the frozen wired transaction number coded: AZQV9007 owned
by you. Note that you do not have any rights to receive these funds if the documented legal wire information
is not complete.

If you don’t have the required document in your possession, these document are only to be issued to you
from the paying country from where it was moved to the Bank of Hong Kong from where they connived with
the HSBC to move the fund to you without getting the required document Intelligence clearance certificate,
to this regards you are adviced to contact this office to obtain the document for the immediate release of
the funds in your name.

Your fund is now in our custody and will not be released to you unless the required document is confirmed,
After that the fund will be released to you immediately without any delay. Reconfirm the below:

1. The country of fund origin,
2. Amount expected,
3. Proof of ownership.

WARNING: Failure to produce the above requirement in the next 5days, legal action will be taken
immediately by us, FORWARD THE DOCUMENTS TO US VIA EMAIL ATTACHEMENT AS SOON AS YOU
OBTAIN IT.

Be it known to you that we will assist you.


Robert S. Mueller, III
Director
Federal Bureau of Investigation ( FBI )

Comments

[barbarienne.livejournal.com]

I especially like that this "monitory transaction been done in the United
States Of America."

The pattern of linguistic error is easily identified by anyone who has worked with ESL immigrants for any length of time...

[kristine-smith.livejournal.com]

It reminded me of something that had been washed and rinsed in Babelfish one time too many.

I think what amused me the most was that it came from the Director himself. The sheer incomprehensibility was a cherry on the sundae.

[mithriltabby]

Have you seen Translation Party?

[kristine-smith.livejournal.com]

Hah. "Wait! Put down that washcloth!" equilibrated into "Wait! Get a towel!" which sort of reversed the intent.